4 Things That You Probably Didn’t Know About Islam and Marriage in Malaysia

Following the heat of the recent Jais raid on a wedding, we at CILISOS decided to take a closer look into Islam and marriage and found a whole bunch of stuff that most people (including us) probably weren’t aware of. Here in Malaysia, we follow two systems of law – One specifically for muslims (Sharia), and one for everyone (secular), including Muslims.

Controversial? Duh.

Confused? Yep… you’re not alone.

Before we start, this will of course touch on cultural and religious law and so we’re almost definitely going to add to the controversy. But at least we’ll try to tidy up some of the confusion.

You have been disclaimer’d, so please don’t flame us!

1. You Don’t Have to Convert to Marry a Muslim

Welllllllllll……sorta. Tough luck if you’re a woman. Only guys have this option.

The Islamic Family Law (Federal Territories) Act of 1984 states that while no woman can marry a non-Muslim, it also states that no man shall marry a non-Muslim except a Kitabiyah

Great.

But what’s a “Kitabiyah”?

Well, depending on who you ask… it translates into “People of the Book” or “One who is a believer of The Revealed Book“,

We’ll let this video explain it a little better:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RR9p8toPNnk

Simply put, you won’t have to convert if you can prove that your ancestors were Christians before the prophethood of the Prophet Muhammad, or were Jews before the prophethood of the Prophet Isa.

So if you’re considering this route, let us say that CILISOS has tried looking for a case where someone has successfully proven they were Kitabiyah, and we reckon your odds range from “remotely possible” to “less than hearing a sensible comment from Ridhuan Tee“.

2.  You Have to Get HIV-Tested

Starting with a fatwa issued in Johor on International AIDS Day 2001, Premarital HIV testing has been mandatory for Muslim couples nation-wide since 2009 with recommendations for non-Muslims to do the same.

However, in the event that a partner tests positive, the marriage is allowed to continue (provided if both parties agree) with counseling provided by the state religious department and state health department.

This decision has its supporters and detractors, with issues such as individual rights, support, and effectiveness being brought into question.

But more than that, it brought a surprising statistic to light:

 3. You can Marry Once You Reach Puberty

Thanks to the obligatory paperwork that came with the HIV testing, a 2010 progress report submitted by the Malaysian Ministry of Health revealed that 32 girls below the age of 10 and 445 girls below the age of 10 and 14 underwent this screening. This is in contrast to two boys under the age of 10 who underwent the same test that year.

The legal age of marriage for non-Muslims is 18 for males (with parental consent) and 16 for females (with consent from the Chief Minister) at minimum. This is the same for Muslims unless consent from the Syariah court is obtained for girls who have reached puberty.

And in case you missed it, only two underaged males were screened that year, meaning that the rest were adults. Also, newer reports suggest that the number of marriage applications in which at least one partner is underaged, is rising.

4. Muslim Divorce Laws are in the Name of Love

With all the talk about extremism, it’s often easy to ignore the redeeming facets of Islamic law, or rather, the original intention of these laws to improve the way we live- even when it comes to divorce.

There are a number of ways a divorce can be obtained, but rather than listing it all down here we instead spoke to an anonymous source who shared her experience (by way of Talaq) with us.

First off, Talaq is the husband’s initiation of the divorce by stating “I divorce/talaq” you. This can be written, verbal, or, thanks to technology, by text message (note: not recommended). If the husband pronounces the talaq in front of two male witnesses, it can be filed in Sharia court to be confirmed. The talaq can also be pronounced in court in front of the judge but both parties have to agree to this. In court, the couple will be asked a series of questions to pertaining to their reasons for divorce. From this, they can either proceed with the divorce – which is finalized after a 3-month “reconciliation period” – or be asked to attend counseling courses while a new court appointment is set.

Compared to regular divorces, Islamic divorces are long, drawn-out processes but there’s a reason for all of that – to ensure that the couple actually wants it. This is because divorce is the final course of action undertaken only, and we quote,  “as a matter of necessity for the avoidance of greater evil which may result from the continuance of a marriage” 

Bonus 1Malaysia Point:  You May Not be (Properly) Married

Okay fine, this is pretty much on a technicality note because it involves customs and traditions rather than  law. And it pretty much applies only to West Malaysia.

Prior to 1982, non-Muslims practiced a dual system of marriage, namely customary marriage and civil law of marriage. This means that due to customary and/or religious beliefs, a ceremony in accordance with those beliefs were sufficient without need of state registration. For example, Hindu marriages would involve the bride’s wearing of the thaali (a pendant equivalent of a wedding ring) as proof of solemnization of marriage. The thaali symbolizes the inseparable bond between husband and wife to be worn throughout their lives together and a union is considered incomplete without this.

However, the Law Reform (Marriage and Divorce) Act of 1976 that came into effect in 1982 has since minimized the importance of such rites in favor of legal documentation.

Sure, we still observe these customs but it has been noted that the deeper meanings of the tradition may have since been lost 

So you might be legally married, but are you culturally married?

But in the end, does it matter?

Marriage was and is still seen as one of the most important institutions in every society, and each will do what they deem necessary to uphold the harmony of a family unit. Sure, some might go overboard in their good intentions but hey, we can at least credit them for having good intentions?

We figured it might be nice to see what we can all learn from this, and to consider the importance of laws in governing our ability to achieve a sustainable marriage versus plain ol’ love, understanding and respect.

On that note, we would like to end this with a quote from Johnny Cash:

“Because you’re mine, I walk the line”

(And please don’t flame us)