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6 Things to Ask Before Sharing #CDM25 (or any other voyeuristic internet video)

By now, most of you would have already seen the video of a woman in a tudung assaulting some poor Chinese uncle about a relatively small fender bender. You would have also seen the comments surrounding the video, ranging from angry to REALLY ANGRY to “I WILL BASH YOUR FACE WITH A STEERING LOCK”!

Even the team here at CILISOS has received several requests to write something about it, and so like the public servants we are… here we go.

1. Has this been shared enough already?

Kiki Kamaruddin facebook fans

Well, according to the RakyatPost, this video has already been shared 17,000 times. In true Malaysian style, there are even numerous memes about it. Any article published about it on other sites is instantly shared a gazillion times, and Facebook groups have been set up to ‘honour’ her achievements.

BUT there’s a reason why you won’t find any links to any of these here – and it’s simply because we don’t think it needs to be shared anymore.

2. Have I ever been angry over something stupid?

from The Malaysian Insider

First off, no we are not condoning her fit of seemingly blind rage. Her response to the little fender bender is indeed quite extreme. Her racial comments are also largely unnecessary. However, in our undocumented moments, have we also thrown a plate, or maybe punched in a postbox, spanked our dogs or even *gasp* called someone a Cina, or a Chowahbeng, or a rempit or a Keling?

How would this look to someone on Facebook?

We live in an age of super-documentation. Everyone has a smartphone and they’re not afraid to use it. What this means is that very little goes unobserved, and a whole lot of it gets shared on Facebook.

3.  Was anyone actually hurt?

The poor Uncle’s car (what car is that anyway?) was given a good bashing, and the Peugeot looks like it might have suffered some mild post-traumatic stress, but the truth is, no one actually got physically hurt.

In fact, the nice people at DiGi even offered to pay for not only the damages for Uncle Sim, but rather awesomely, for Kiki’s damages as well, which means in effect, even the cars aren’t suffering any permanent damage.

Probably the only hurt here is the amount of people now asking DiGi to pay for other stuff that’s happened to them.

DiGi cdm25 11

DiGi cdm25 12

DiGi cdm25 13

How big is your #30HariBaik budget guys? Our server got er… crashed the other day too. Email us!

4. Has she been punished enough already?

Kiki facebook links

Considering THAT, and the sheer amount of bad vibes about her, we at CILISOS think the answer here is YES. Her wedding business is probably not going to be doing very well, and her Facebook account has already been deleted. She probably won’t be able to look her friends in the eyes for a very long time.

She’s even issued an official apology on her FB, and contacted Uncle Sim, who has apparently forgiven her.

UPDATE: Ok, so apparently that official apology was when her account was hacked. But actually she did apologise in real life to Uncle Sim.

– and yes, apparently she was just having a bad day. 

“I couldn’t think at the time. It was on the spur of the moment. It was a huge mistake on my part. I accept whatever abuse that is hurled at me because I made a terrible mistake,” – Siti Fairrah Ashykin (Kiki).

Awwwww 🙁

How did Malaysian beef become more expensive than imported beef!?

We started the ball rolling with a vote for Yes. Also, partially because she didn’t do anything to us personally. Come on guys… it’s Ramadhan!

5. Is this even true?


Evidence has emerged that it might’ve been her sister that was the culprit, which could mean that the entire FB community might have been shaming the wrong person. Yes, everyone has handphones these days, but not all of them have kickass cameras. It’s kinda hard to tell who it is.

UPDATE: Refer to point 4

6. What’s the worst that could happen?

College Student Alyssa Funke Commits Suicide Following Cyberbullying Over Porn

Now this is the part you might not expect. Ever since Facebook made things go viral, public shaming has resulted in some pretty harsh consequences. It’s a bit of mob mentality mixed up with our inner desire for supporting justice. What kind of consequences? Well, on the modest side, a demotion or an expulsion, and on the harsher side – even suicide.

But according to an article titled “Why You Should Think Twice Before Shaming Anyone on Social Media” in WIRED Magazine, , what’s most worrying is this.

“The fundamental problem is that many shamers, like Richards, don’t fully grasp the power of the medium. It’s a problem that lots of us need to reckon with: There are millions of Twitter accounts with more than 1,000 followers, and millions on Facebook with more than 500 friends. The owners of those accounts might think they’re just regular people, whispering to a small social circle. But in fact they’re talking through megaphones that can easily be turned up to a volume the entire world can hear,” – Laura Hudson, WIRED.

In Singapore, there’s a petition signed by more than 22,000 people calling for the close of, which is a ‘citizen’s reporting’ site that allows people to report ‘news’. Yes, those inverted commas are there cos we don’t think much of the site. It’s packed with what most people would call private moments, exposed to a massive public, hungry for more scandal.

Articles there range from migrants passed out drunk at MRT stations to people getting angry seemingly for no reason. There also seems to be a massive archive of people who don’t give up their MRT seats for the elderly, sometimes not illogically.

When this many people seem to call out for blood, corporations are pressured to give it. And people get fired, or boycotted, or worse. In this case, there’s every chance that Kiki’s business dreams are over, and even after that… there’s every chance that the next job interview she’ll have to go for will be with someone who’s seen her video, and like many of you, has a strong opinion about it.

Thing is, when you’re watching a 3 minute video, or seeing a single status update online, you’re getting a short glimpse into someone’s life. Take any of our status updates on their own, and you can make us look like Dr. Evil.

Sure, it’s cool when you read that an expat named Anton Casey  got fired due to his racist comments about Singapore, but take it from us here at CILISOS – everyone says stupid things, and no one wants to get fired… so do take some time to think before you share.




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  5. patungcendana

    26/07/2014 at 11:33 pm

    salam and good day.

    I’ve just read this article. Its a very diplomatic article… 🙂
    However… I have to disagree with the part about no one getting hurt. Yes… no one got hurt… physically… but… she hurt the pride of women… especially Muslim women… more specifically… those who wear tudung.
    Furthermore… Having a bad day… does not justify being rude to anyone… especially a person who is much older than us… I dont even know whether her apology was sincere or is the result of public pressure… she should just plead temporary insanity… lol.
    As you can see… I have no sympathy for her… (on the account of me… being an emotional person) and I don’t know… maybe you’re really a very cool and rational person… but… how would you feel if it was your father who was being abused by her… 🙂

    • Chak Onn Lau

      28/07/2014 at 4:17 pm

      Thanks patungcendana for being as diplomatic with your difference in opinion 🙂 to be honest, we do believe that a certain amount of shaming is fair for her behavior. However we also felt the level of humiliation she received was a bit extreme. Also we only saw a glimpse of what happened…. Who’s to say what uncle lim did before. All we’re saying is to at least consider these things before sharing. There are much worse crimes going on in this country that don’t get this kind of attention 🙂

  6. Kamil

    24/07/2014 at 7:48 am

    I absolutely agree with this post 100%!
    but the thing is, I’m quite confident that all of this will peter out within the next few months. Some other viral thing will happen, and people will jump on that bandwagon. Malaysian’s are like that. Just think, it’s only been a few weeks since the case of the mom that abandoned her disabled child, and people already forgotten about it. Malaysians have “Drama Addiction” and that’s the problem. Think about it, we go crazy about the plot of an actual TV drama. It’s not like real drama is any better.. Just my 2 cents

    • Chak Onn Lau

      24/07/2014 at 10:45 am

      Thanks Kamil! The short attention span is partly our fault for creating media that jumps onto the next thing so quickly. The purpose of this post however, was to get peoples eyeballs while the topic was hot, to give them things to consider the next time something like this happens 🙂

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  8. Amelia

    18/07/2014 at 5:29 pm

    Hi Chak Onn, great posting and well said. What you posted in fact it’s very true. OMG, within 2 days the video is share 17,000 times??? Oh well, now a day the slightest things happen in public, people will take out their handphone and start clicking and next mins it’s upload in FB. Then within 5 mins few hundred people will share out. Sometimes it can be very scary and some are fake gossips. LOL

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Have a great day.

    • Chak Onn Lau

      18/07/2014 at 5:52 pm

      Thanks Amelia! Yea and now there are people who’ve very creepily posted up pictures of the outside of KIKI’s house. A lynch mob usually doesn’t end prettily, so just to clarify… we’re not saying don’t share, but at least spare a thought for the potential consequences 🙂

  9. Jeremy

    17/07/2014 at 3:48 pm

    Well thought, well considered, and as always, well written. Thank you Chak Onn @ cilicos!

    The memes, comics, and parody pages were indeed funny to digest initially (and hey, Even good ol’ Raja Bomoh made a small comeback!). But where I really began to shiver was when things started getting really personal. And by personal I mean the use of this lady’s glam shots followed by creeper pics circulating Whatsapp of her car and home…My, how the tables turned quicker than that video went viral.

    “So who’s the real ‘kurang ajar’ now?”, I asked myself. Stay classy Malaysia!

    • Chak Onn Lau

      17/07/2014 at 5:35 pm

      Thanks man! or should i say… ANCHORman 😉

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