8 craziest things Malaysian kids have done when they go out with parents

Even though mothers go through hours and hours of painful labour to bring them into this world and love them so much (as only Asian parents do), Malaysian kids will still do the most unexpected things, at the most unexpected times.

Add that together with the fact that there will be a massive increase in the number of malls in the next two years, and Malaysians seeming obsession with malls on weekends, and what you’ll end up with is ALOT of embarassed parents. In fact, we were guessing there would be quite alot of embarrassed parents already out there, so we teamed up with Nestlé to find them!

Cos now parents can stay home and get your Nestlé products delivered to you

Some of our friends over at Nestlé are parents too, so they totally understand your predicament – you wanna feed yer kids well, but you don’t want them destroying the supermarket. So now they wanna help ugaiz (along with other Malaysians) shop for healthy groceries online at Lazada and 11street! Jimat malu, jimat masa!

The best part is, it’s even cheaper than going to the supermarket. From now until 31st October 2016, you save at up to 45% or more on Nestlé’s healthy food range as part of their  Nestlé Together-Gather Wellness campaign. Good food, delivered to your doorstep, at a good price… what else could you ask for?

Anyway, to further illustrate the advantages of shopping online, we worked with Nestlé to find the funniest, most embarrassing things kids have done when parents go out jalan-jalan. Here are 8 submissions from CILISOS parents which will make you respect Malaysian parents more than ever.

 

1. The kid who wanted to have his cake, and smash it too

The only things you want to hear when you are in a fancy restaurant are the soft clinking of cutlery, violins playing in the background, and hushed conversations. Not screaming children! Unfortunately for Amir Hazim when he was dining at Hilton Hotel, he got the latter…

“So my wife has a nephew who is honestly a tiny devil. My wife and I, along with her sister and the devil (nephew), were having a fancy dinner, when the table behind us were celebrating their grandmother’s birthday.” – Amir

The nephew (who was 6), not being able to resist birthdays and cake, ran to the table behind. You won’t guess what happened next. He blew all them candles out and when they tried to pull him away, Amir’s nephew started screaming at the top of his lungs, and SMASHED the cake to the ground. Senang di-binasa, sedap di-makan (#Nestlésubtlemessage1).

“From that moment onwards, I told my wife lets always use protection.” – Amir

Speaking of sexytime products…

 

2. The kids who wanted to share candy that wasn’t candy

Rudy Irwan’s two daughters who are 7 and 8 respectively are at their tastebuds exploration stage. While doing their monthly grocery shopping, they like to pester ayah for treats. One day, they were at a minimarket in Pantai Tengah, Langkawi:

“So intuitively I said, ‘Select one only and bring them over at the cashier’. When my turn at the cashier finally came, to my horror and embarrassment, the supposed treat they choose was…er… strawberry flavoured lubricant.”- Rudy

This was the conversation that happened next…

Rudy: Oh err.. No no no this is not for kids.
Daughters: But daddy, it’s strawberry. We will share.
Rudy: No! Choose something else.
Daughters: But you said choose one.
Rudy: This is for adults!
Daughters: What is adults?
Rudy: *out of response*

 

3. The kid who learnt the right way of sitting in a trolley

This happened to a friend of a CILISOS writer. When her daughter was around 3 or 4, she liked to sit in the trolley. Not the kid seat, but the part where you would put groceries. There is actually a notice on the trolley for parents not to put their kids in the trolley, but she had two young kids, so she would put one sit in the kid seat and the other in the main part of the trolley.

So when they were in IKEA one day, the parents stopped the trolley to look at something. In that split second they looked away, their daughter flipped and fell off the trolley! She hit her head on the ground.

“I carried her and ran upstairs to the restaurant asking for ice for her head. It was kinda embarrassing and mostly scary actually. I was in full on panic mode. They didn’t have ice some more. All they gave was a wet cold cloth. Aih.” – our writer’s friend

The mother really sakit hati to see her baby crying with a black and bloodied eye which lasted a few days. Now whenever she sees kids standing in the trolley, she will tell the parents nicely. Most of them are appreciative and get their kids to sit down or get out of the trolley.

 

4. The kid who called her mom on the ultimate sin

To kids, the free toy in the cereal is prolly more exciting than the cereal itself. So when Salbiah Yunos’ daughter asked her to buy cereal just for the toy, Salbiah’s first reaction was to ask if her daughter will eat the cereal onot. The answer was no. Immediately, her daughter started crying loudly and stomping her feet repeatedly.

“She even cried loudly saying I’m not her mother and keep repeating ‘Mama berdosa sebab buat saya marah dengan tak tunaikan kemahuan saya’.” – Salbiah

Salbiah was so mortified that she rushed to the counter, to quickly pay and cabut, but everyone was staring since her daughter was crying all the way. Luckily the queue was short, can ciao faster.

 

5. The kid that couldn’t keep ibu’s secret

This story is so embarrassing we even turned red for the mother who submitted it. Laila was doing the groceries with my kids when she (very discreetly) let out a little fart.

“My 3-year-old proceeded to shout excitedly, ‘MAMA KENTUT! MAMA KENTUT! HA HA HA, MAMA YOU KENTUT RIIIIIGHT?!’ Other shoppers turned and smirked at me.” – Laila

Wahh this kid really sihat dan kuat wei (#Nestlesubtleplug2)! But Laila was too cool to care. She embraced the fart and told her kid, “Yes, I did. Thank you.” They all carried on shopping, but her son giggled the rest of the trip. You go, Laila! Keep your head up high, coz there’s prolly gonna be plenty more embarrassments where that came from until kids grow up. 😉

 

6. Malaysia’s youngest shoplifter

It was a girls day out for Sheryll and her two daughters who went clothes shopping, except she also brought her 2-year-old boy along. He wanted to hold on to some kiddy sunglasses, so Sheryll let him have it for a while. Then he went back to the display and came back with the same pair of sunnies. No one thought much of it until they went home…

“My daughter suddenly let out a scream! She found the sunglasses in her bag. We were discussing when he could have put it in her bag without her noticing (we all thought someone else had taken it away from him, coz we had to rush off in a hurry after paying for our purchases). Then my daughter suddenly went back to her bag again and found…a second exact same pair of sunglasses!” – Sheryll

LOL, when he goes for it, he really goes for it! Poor Sheryll had to go back to the shop (wearing her own sunglasses ala celebrity trying to be incognito), hoping no one would accuse her of shoplifting. She quickly handed the loot back to the sales staff and now everyone is on supervision mode whenever they go shopping with the little fella.

 

7. Finding Buddha in Queensbay Mall

Zara Kim and her nephew went shopping in Queensbay Mall in Penang when he was about 4. While going up the escalator, a monk was going down on the other side. Her nephew gawked for a while and when the monk was next to us, he shouted, “Hey Buddha!”

“Needless to say I was mortified because he kept saying, ‘Look, look! Buddha!”‘ He wanted to U-turn down the escalator just to see the monk again. Bless his little 4 year old heart” – Zara

Thankfully, Malaysian buddhist monks are known as the most peace-loving monks in the world – with a bunch of them from Penang seeking help with an ant-infestation at their temple – because they’re not allowed to harm other beings.

 

8. Buying 10 packs of condoms for mummy and daddy

When Vera’s friend was admitted to the hospital for an emergency labor, she was totally unprepared and hadn’t packed anything. Her husband rushed like mad to get off work, pick up their first child (a 3-year-old) from the nursery. Vera’s friend called the husband and drowned him with a list of things to get, such as sanitary pads, toiletries, and other stuff.

So the husband ran into the nearest 7-11, put their 3-year-old on the counter and went to grab whatever he needed. After putting the stuff on the counter, he went a second round to grab some food. When they arrived at the hospital, they discovered that in the brief moment the left the bag alone, their kid stuffed more than 10 packets of er… contraceptives of various brands.

“The night shift employees and husband had a good laugh. Apparently the baby was very pleased with himself thinking all those colourful boxes were candies, but then my friend was shooting lasers at her husband. (She used to tell me she has three children – two babies and a man-child.)” – Vera

Maybe their kids didn’t want any siblings? Well sometimes… one is enough…

 

 

OMG! Maybe sometimes it’s better for Malaysian parents to just stay home

You might be ROFL-ing reading these stories, but put yourself in those parents shoes. They probably don’t even wanna put on any shoes in the first place.

So to all Malaysian parents – HAVE A BREAK! (#NestleSubtlePlug3)! Lounge at home in your baju buruk rags. Doneed to even step out of the house and just live off whatever you can buy online through Nestle’s Together-Gather promo! 

Take the month of October off your shoes, and keep those darn kids at home 🙂

PS: First one who can tell us the brands for all three NestleSubtlePlugs, we’ll give you a special prize!