Dear CILISOS readers,
We’ve been waiting all year for Halloween to bring to you another spine-chilling round of spoooooky horror movies based on sometimes even SPOOKIER news headlines. Last year, we ran Part 1 and ugaiz loved it so much (at least that’s what we think), so we decided to sell them as t-shirts (click here to buy!).
So put on this Spotify playlist and enjoy these movies that’ll keep you awake with the lights on at night, your head under your blanket, crying out for mommy… But don’t lift your head though, cause between toll price increases and the haze, you never know if you’re already living in a real life horror movie.*evil cackle*
[Disclaimer: The events depicted in this movie are fictitious. Any similarity to any person living or dead is merely coincidental. Writers were not on weird substances while writing this. Really.]
1. Need for SPAD
Starring: Some Seng and more Some Seng
Plot: In a busy city in Malaysia, one taxi driver has had enough of the cartels. Despite warnings from his friends, he ventures out on his own, buying a Proton Saga and taking in jobs through another mysterious organisation known as UBER. Soon, some friends join him… and the organisation grows.
But the cartel doesn’t let go so easily, and things get violently out of hand.
2. Mighty Malay Power Rangers
Starring: Yamal Junos, Must Lan, 100,000 Bersih people
Plot: With their bodies trapped in a naked, virtual world called ‘Facebook’, the Bersih 4.0 army were set free when a radioactive drink, 1MDBeverage, was accidentally spilled onto the power source. Once free, they began their attack for global domination by spreading jaundice in various parts of the planet.
In these desperate times, the heroic Mighty Malay Power Rangers (played by newcomer Yamal Junos) emerged to protect the livelihood of their people through empowering quotes and mathematical skills. As they battled it out, Lord Mangkuk (played by celebrity chef Mus Lan) sent reinforcements in the form of mechanical robots known as the Kapchai2000 to help the Rangers trample the mighty secret weapon of the Bersih army: the vuvuzelas.
3. The Sixth Sen
Starring: Nageeb Rassak, Mus Lan, poor people
Plot: In a small Malay village, a young boy (Mus Lan) is haunted with nightly visions of poor people roaming the streets. Horrified, he is soon befriended by a minister named Bruce (Rassak), who tries to cure him of his visions, by giving him handouts, sponsored by his other subjects.
However, the more he receives, the more the visions intensify. Will Mus Lan learn to cope on his own? Or will he join the subjects of his nightmares… as a poor person?
4. Captain Malaysia & the Wynton Soilder
Starring: Mahadhir, Kha Leed, Joe Low, Eiffel Tower
Plot: It’s the war of wars between the hero of the world, Captain Malaysia (played by award-winning director/actor Mahadhir) and the evil Wynton soilder (played by newcomer Joe Low). However, the Wynton soldier is an elusive enemy, with a secret cloaking device that can drain resources out of countries, while being totally invisible on the battlefield.
And now, he’s set his sights on Malaysia.
Enter a young, beautiful clarevoyant named Sarah Wak, who can see through the Wynton Solder’s cloaking device and soon join forces with Captain Malaysia to save the country from being drained. In a race against time, will Captain Malaysia triumph? Or will his past come back to haunt him?
5. Jurrasic Parkatan
Starring: Uncle Lim, Hardy Awang
Plot: Sometimes, man does not know their own limits. In an amusement park called Park Atan, professors Gwaning and Ralph Fizzy manage to develop a new, religious breed of dinosaur known as the Hajiosaur in the hopes that it will attract more religious tourists to the park.
However, the HAJIOSAUR soon runs rampant, and heads for another park, leaving Park Atan reeling from the shock. Will they ever recover?
6. The Ring-git
Starring: More poor people
Plot: In this ‘The Sixth Sen’ spinoff, a young man one day finds that although he tried to withdraw RM500 from the ATM, only RM470 came out. He then gets a creepy call on his cellphone, with a voice simply saying… “SssssIXx PERCENTTtttT“. The next week, he goes to the ATM, he only gets RM440. Again, he get’s a call with the voice saying “Oneeee EMMM DEE BEEEEEE!“.
Frantically, he keeps trying different ATMs around the country, and they keep shortchanging him. His house is repossessed, his family leaves him, and soon he finds himself with little to live for. Will he have to leave the country to survive!?
7. The Cabinet in the Woods
Starring: Muhyi Deen, Palan-G, Wonwon Bin, Hasan Malique, Shafie Apahal
Plot: For many years, 30 men lived in a cabinet deep in the woods, away from the Rakyat. When one brave man named MuhyiDeen (of LUSA fame) dared to venture out to meet the Rakyat, he returned to find himself mysteriously replaced. Soon, other men were being replaced… and the ones who were left were strangely voiceless.
Oh we do wish some of these were more fictional
But one of the things that makes us truly Malaysian is our ability to take the hard times on the chin and laugh it off. Just be sure that once your jaw recovers, you’ll join us in thinking of ways to make Malaysia a better place in these tough times ahead 🙂
Happy Halloween, Malaysians 🙂